Are you going through a roommate change, or are you looking to get an apartment? Make sure to read these tips on how to pick out roommates and keep a great relationship. Being compatible in living together is one of the most important aspects of picking who will you live with the following school year.When the going gets tough, the tough get ... housemates?
In these brutal financial times, having a housemate – or even two or three – can be one of the best ways to reduce your rent and other costs, and keep your head above water.
It can also be the quickest way to a murder rap, if you live with somebody who drives you up the wall.
How do you ensure that the “Roommate Remedy” doesn't turn into “Housemate Hell”? Fear not: We know how bad you look in black and white stripes. So we got the experts to cough up these 15 strategies for you.
Plan to succeed
The best way to make sure your roommate situation works, of course, is to actually create a good situation from the get-go – and that means choosing the right housemates.
How?
1. Start fresh. If possible, start out in a new living situation where no one thinks he or she has seniority and therefore more of a voice than anyone else in how the house or apartment is run, says Amy Zalneraitis, author of "Room for Improvement: The Post-College Girl's Guide to Roommate Living."
2. Play the numbers. "Always opt to live with one other person over two other people to avoid triangulated roommate relationships," Zalneraitis says. "For example, I once moved in with two girls who had already lived together for some time. Their apocalyptic-style partying would happen every Friday night. Because they were on the same page when it came to this type of partying (and had sort of established the rules or lack thereof before I moved in), it was hard for me to stop it. Two against one. I felt like I had very little power." (Zalneraitis notes that this applies much more to young women than to men, in her experience.)
3. Best friends — bad? "If you want to stay friends (with friends), then roommate with strangers," says Sylvia Bergthold, author of "Sorry, the Boa Has Gotta Go: A Roommate Survival Guide." "That way you keep your friends and hopefully make a new one in the process."
Why not live with friends? Because good friends take liberties in a living situation that put stress on the relationship, and the relationship often suffers as a result, Bergthold says.
"I've found that my most successful roommate situations have been people that I sort of knew, through friends of friends," Zalneraitis adds. "So I knew that I would have similar tastes to them, and that they weren't crazy, because a friend was vouching for them, but at the same time we weren't spending every minute together."
4. Play detective. "Spend some time together with each other and get a feel for that person," Zalneraitis says. Does he have totally different beliefs? Does one person like to party all the time and the other have to work early, every morning? Ask each other what your goals are in having a roommate: a best friend? A drinking buddy? An invisible rent-payer? "Pay attention to how people answer questions," Zalneraitis says.
5. Trust your gut. By the time you're in your 20s and 30s, you know enough about people to know if something doesn't feel right. Trust that instinct. A red flag now is likely trouble for you later. "Don't ever turn your 'crazy detector' off," Zalneraitis says. "You'd be surprised how many crazy/troubled/unpleasant people are out there."
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